poetsthought's Diaryland Diary

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lil' piece of writing \"Here I Sit.\"

"Here I Sit." --02.26.03 Wednesday--
              Here I sit.
So very easily, I have gone to the extreme; felt things I never dreamed of feeling. I did what I only dreamed of doing... and here I now sit.
              Memories cloud my brain as bittersweet nostalgia washes over me. Never did I see myself proving to someone like you all that I have proved; that I was deserving of you and you were deserving of me. Never did I see you returning those feelings I've kept hidden for so long. But then again... never did I see this happening; to us, to me...
              Such amazing grace I have always seen in you, and now... I see the same feelings I've always felt mirrored in your eyes. Such beautiful eyes... amazing how they could tell such wonderful lies.
              Here I sit.
              Alone.
              Waiting by the phone.
              You said you'd call the minute you landed and got off the plane. You promised not to be late and would be home before dark. You promised. You promised as only you could, heart and soul; body and mind. You promised that never again would I feel built up and brought down, that I could only expect to be loved and respected and treated like the queen you say I am.
              But here I sit.
              Alone.
              Here I sit... wondering about all that has happened... wondering if I have given all for nothing...
              How can I tell you about all these feelings when they all came to mind because you haven't called as you promised?
              Maybe we were never meant to be together. Maybe I was never meant to feel this way. Only you can reassure me but I can't get to you. I can't tell you how scared I am that something may have happened and I have lost you forever.
              Please come home to me... please just call... please reassure me...

              Asha jumped from the couch at the sound of the doorbell. Casting one longing glance at the phone, urging it to ring, she answered the door.
              Standing before her in the doorway was HIM. Smelling damn good as always; looking sexy as hell. Carrying in his harms he held a dozen red roses.
              "Forgive me for coming straight here instead of calling, baby. I just had to see you... talking on the phone with you for a brief second while driving on my way home would not have been the same as seeing you."
              Shock spread through her body as her mind and heart struggled to comprehend the fact that here he stood. In her doorway. Wanting only to see her and hold her.
              He handed her the roses and watched in amusement as she mechanically took the bonquet and smelled the roses.
              "All for you, baby. I love you, Asha."
              Their bodies moved together as all of Asha's inhibitions melted from her mind. "I love you, too. Just never leave me hanging like that... or I will not be responsible for my actions..." She purred.
              "As you wish, my dear. As you wish," he answered lovingly as he reassured his girlfriend.
              Away I am swept by your amazing love. No more, here do I sit; for no longer am I alone.

6:25 PM - 06.18.04 Friday

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